NORTHSHORE CHURCH OF CHRIST

I wonder if my generation hasn’t underemphasized ritual and overemphasized spontaneity.

Consider the husband who brings his wife flowers every Friday. He replaces the old flowers in the vase and kisses his sweetheart.

Consider, also, the husband who brings his wife flowers once or twice a year when he gets that special urge. His wife wonders what the occasion is.

Some think the second husband is more romantic and his gift would be more heartfelt. But why should it be that way? Could not the first husband’s flower ritual be more heartfelt than the second husband’s haphazard way of showing his love?

Neither necessarily shows what is in the husband’s heart, but I would guess the first husband thinks of his wife more than the second. He certainly puts more effort into his marriage, at least from a flower-gift perspective.

Think about your daily prayers. And, yes, dear Christian, you should have a daily prayer habit! Daniel prayed three times a day, and his enemies knew exactly where and when he would hit his knees. Daniel had a prayer ritual in place. Just because you pray at the same time every day doesn’t mean it’s not heartfelt. In truth, some days will be more heartfelt than others, but the ritual does not determine this. The ritual makes sure you pray.

Think about times of spiritual devotion with your family. Do you think you are more spiritual if these times are unscheduled? Dad randomly yells, “Okay, kids, let’s have some family worship!” If your kids are like mine, at least a few of them will come grumbling because you interrupted something they were doing. But if you have it scheduled, the kids tend to set aside that time and gather with a more focused mind.

What about meeting with the saints? We meet on a regular schedule, and our organized fellowship and worship looks very similar from week to week. We have rituals established. Does that mean they are not heartfelt? Not at all! The rituals give us a framework to our activities. We don’t have to think through the entire schedule every Lord’s Day, and we can focus on the important matters. We sing together, pray together, share the word of God together, and eat the Lord’s Supper together every week. Are we less than genuine? Not at all!

God gives grace through the excellent daily and weekly habits we build. The ritual helps us continue exercising what needs to be exercised. This week’s fellowship may not be outstanding or mind blowing as a single event, but our times of fellowship build momentum and we experience growth and feelings of solidarity, peace, and joy in what our Lord is doing.

Don’t fall for the lie that our worship and expressions of love must always be spontaneous to be genuine. It’s not so. In fact, we will wear ourselves out if we try to live life this way! Another grace God gives through ritual is that it prevents burnout. The husband who tries to think of something new every day to show his wife how much he loves her will eventually run out of ideas. The husband who knows a few things his wife loves and continues to give her and do those things week after week will find a steady rhythm to life.

This does not mean that spontaneity does not profit. Everyone likes changing things up once in a while! But spontaneity should be the exception, not the rule.

God gives grace through ritual. Don’t wait for the muse to hit, for lightning to strike, for inspiration to fall. Just plan to be where you need to be every day and every week and keep those commitments faithfully. Remember the tortoise and the hare and keep faithfully plodding.

Deacons are simply servants of the church. The church appoints these servants to fulfill certain tasks necessary to the working of the church. Early disciples in Jerusalem appointed these servants to take care of their needy widows (Acts 6), but their qualifications (1 Tim. 3.8-13) indicate they serve the church in more ways.

In Jesus’ teaching, the greatest of all is the least of all, and Jesus used διάκονος (diakonos) to describe us: And he sat down and called the twelve. And he said to them, “If anyone would be first, he must be last of all and servant of all” (Mark 9.35) “But it shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant…” (Mark 10.43)

God called the Roman government His διάκονος: “he [the governing authority] is God’s servant for your good” (Rom. 13.4).

Jesus Himself is a διάκονος to Israel: “For I tell you that Christ became a servant to the circumcised to show God’s truthfulness, in order to confirm the promises given to the patriarchs…” (Rom. 15.8)

This word is used in many places throughout the New Testament. We understand by the context of 1 Tim. 3.1-13 that Paul writes of offices or positions in the church. The role of overseer / elder is an office of the church. Likewise (1 Tim. 3.8) there exists the role or office of deacon.

When addressing the Philippian church, Paul wrote “To all the saints in Christ Jesus who are at Philippi, with the overseers and deacons” (Phil. 1.1).

Those who serve their church in this official capacity should be tested and proven to be faithful before the church appoints them to this service. They not only serve the church; they represent the church (and, thus, Christ). Their qualifications differ from those of elders in several respects, but they are quite similar. We should look for men who are “dignified, not double-tongued, not addicted to much wine, not greedy for dishonest gain. They must hold the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience” (1 Tim. 3.8-9). They should manage their children and households well and be the husbands of one wife (1 Tim. 3.12). Women servants “must be dignified, not slanderers, but sober-minded, faithful in all things” (1 Tim. 3.11).

Those who serve well (i.e., faithfully), “gain a good standing for themselves and also great confidence in the faith that is in Christ Jesus” (1 Tim. 3.13).

Isn’t it interesting that God requires men and women to be qualified before they serve the church in this capacity? These are not “advanced” Christians. They simply walk as Christians ought. They provide good examples to the flock, and they do not embarrass the church by shirking their responsibilities. They are faithful in their duties and faithful to the gospel of Jesus Christ.

No wonder they gain confidence in the faith! Faithful service has that wonderful side-effect.

Are you qualified to serve?

Jesus said, “You will recognize them by their fruits” (Matthew 7.15–20). He immediately launched into a heavy message:

“Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of My Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to Me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in Your name, and cast our demons in Your name, and do many mighty works in Your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from Me, you workers of lawlessness” (Matthew 7.21–23)

The term “Lord, Lord,” indicates a perceived closeness, as if they considered Jesus a close friend. But Jesus will say to them, “I never knew you.” He surely knew who they were, but He did not know them as a friend; He never had a good relationship with them, despite their protestations. Why did He not know them? Because they did not do the will of His Father.

Do you say you believe in Jesus? Are you bearing fruits which prove your faith?

You see, God does not save people so that we might continue doing the works we have always done. He does not save us to leave us alone. He saves us to change us into something better, more glorious, more just, more kind, more loving. “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come” (2 Corinthians 5.17).

Paul lists the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5.22–24, which is: “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.”

Paul taught Christians to “continue in the faith, and...through many tribulations we must enter the kingdom of God” (Acts 14.22)

If a Christian is ever unsure about his standing with God, 1 John is an excellent letter to read. Everyone should think about himself or herself as he or she reads the following:

1. If we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin. (1.7)
2. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1.9)
3. By this we know we have come to know Him, if we keep His commandments. (2.3)
4. Whoever keeps His word, in him truly the love of God is perfected. (2.5)
5. By this we may know that we are in Him: whoever says he abides in Him ought to walk in the same way in which He [Jesus] walked. (2.6)
6. Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness. Whoever loves his brother abides in the light, and in Him there is no cause for stumbling. (2.9–10)
7. Do not love the world or thing things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. (2.15)
8. Whoever does the will of God abides forever (2.17)
9. No one who denies the Son has the Father. Whoever confesses the Son has the Father also. (2.23)
10. You may be sure that everyone who practices righteousness has been born of Him (2.29)
11. Everyone who makes a practice of sinning also practices lawlessness; sin is lawlessness. (3.4)
12. No one born of God makes a practice of sinning, for God’s seed abides in him; and he cannot keep on sinning, because he has been born of God. By this it is evident who are the children of God, and who are the children of the devil: whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is the one who does not love his brother. (3.9)
13. We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brothers. (3.14)
14. Let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth. By this we shall know that we are of the truth and reassure our hear before Him” (3.18–19)
15. This is His commandment, that we believe in the name of His Son Jesus Christ and love one another, just as He has commanded us. (4.23)
16. Every spirit that confesses that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God, and every spirit that does not confess Jesus is not from God. (4.2–3)
17. Whoever knows God listens to us [the apostles]; whoever is not from God does not listen to us. By this we know the Spirit of truth and the spirit of error. (4.6)
18. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. (4.8)
19. If we love one another, God abides in us and His love is perfected in us. (4.12)
20. Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God. (4.15)
21. And this is the commandment we have from Him: whoever loves God must also love his brother. (4.21)
22. Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ has been born of God, and everyone who loves the Father loves whoever has been born of Him. (5.1)
23. By this we know that we love the children of God: when we love God and obey His commandments. (5.2)

Don’t get the wrong idea from this list, as if this is a to-do checklist of how you are going to prove to God that you’re a good person and on His side. That is not it at all! This is a list of PROOFS which will show YOU that you have, indeed, been born again.

If these fruits are not in your life, the solution is not to simply start doing them. The problem is that you do not know the Lord, you have not been born again! But if these fruits are present (even in embryonic stages), you can take heart in your relationship with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

If you believe you do not have a relationship with the Father based on this list, what should you do? Go back to the top and focus on the Gospel message. Jesus Christ and Him crucified. Why was He crucified? To pay for your sins, to take your sins upon His own shoulders on the cross, and to make a great exchange with you. Sink your teeth into 2 Corinthians 5.14–21:

14 For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: that one has died for all, therefore all have died; 15 and He died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for Him who for their sake died and was raised.

16 From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. 17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. 18 All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to Himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; 19 that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to Himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. 20 Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. 21 For our sake He made Him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God.

The great exchange is right here. It is just as it sounds: Jesus took something from us and gave us something else in return.

Jesus took our sins: “not counting their trespasses against them.”

Jesus gave us righteousness: “so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God.”

A changed man, a new man, lives now not for himself but for the one who died for him and was raised for his sake. He is a new creation, created in Christ Jesus for good works (Ephesians 2.10).

Praise God for His awesome work through Jesus Christ! Let us live for Him always.

Since an elder’s job is to care for the household of God, it is important he first show himself to be a good manager in his home, which means he must have a home to manage. An elder should not be a single man who has had no children. He should have a wife (he must be a one-woman-man) and should have demonstrated an ability to keep his children in submission and manage them well.

Paul wrote to Timothy: “He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God’s church?” (1 Tim 3.4–5 ESV).

The phrase “with all dignity” gives us an interesting picture, doesn’t it? The sweet lady who runs our homeschool group recently said she always takes prospective families to the park to interview them before she decides if she will accept them onto her campus. At the park, she watches how the kids interact with their parents and with each other, and she reasons that if they are wild and disobedient at the park, they will probably be that way on campus, too. Likewise, if they are sweet and obedient, she can probably expect that behavior. If we were to visit a man’s home and find his children do not respect him and are rowdy and rambunctious, it reveals how he has managed his home.

Paul told Titus an elder should have “faithful children not accused of dissipation or insubordination” (Tit. 1.6 NKJV). The word for “faithful” here is the Greek term pista, which is an adjective translated several ways in the New Testament. It is most often translated “faithful” or “trustworthy,” though it does, at times, refer to someone who is faithful in the sense of being a believer in Christ. For several reasons, I believe the proper understanding here is that the children are “faithful” in the sense of being “trustworthy,” and Paul further defined what he meant: a faithful child is one who is “not accused of dissipation or insubordination.”

Paul goes on, in his next sentence, to say, “For a bishop must be blameless, as a steward of God…” If a man has children who party, drink, carouse, act out sexually, etc., they blemish their father’s name. You can think of some of our public servants in offices all the way up the President whose children mar the family name. If a man’s children are causing problems in the community, it’s harder to consider the man blameless—not that he has necessarily committed any sin, but it seems evident that he has left some things undone in his family.

Our society is different than Paul’s. Our children often not only leave home but also the area. As an example, my dad lives and worships with a church in north Alabama. His three sons have never lived in that area since we left home. If one of his adult sons causes trouble in a different city and a different state, it may or may not reflect on him. That would be something the church would need to consider if they were deciding whether to appoint him an elder. If the adult son were in the same town and the community knew him and his father, his immorality and the trouble he caused would probably reflect on the father.

If a man still has children in his home, it is easier to determine how he manages his home, the relationship he has with his children, how he guides and interacts with them. But if all the children have left home, many in the church may not even know who his children are. How should we examine this man? God expects us to use good judgment, so we might ask some questions. Has he raised kids? How does he think he did? What does his wife think? Do his kids love him or hate him now; what kind of relationship does he maintain with his adult children? Would any of his kids cause their father’s name (and thus the name of Christ) to be blemished in this church and community? Would anyone have just cause to say he cannot be considered blameless in this matter?

Having faithful children is an important qualification for a man who would be an elder in God’s church. However, it is but one qualification among many. We should look at the overall character of the man and use wisdom and sound judgment with the full direction of God’s word. And pray for wisdom! May God be glorified.

God said in the beginning: “It is not good for man to be alone.” He made a woman to be man’s helper, a fully compatible partner who completed him. In creating marriage, God taught all men and women that we are not to be lone wolves or isolationists.

Now, God was not saying that all men and women must marry—marriage is not a mandate. But God created marriage as the norm, and we should raise our children to understand that marriage is good, right, and holy.

There’s more to learn, though, in the words, “It is not good for man to be alone.”

When Satan tore Job’s world down, three of his friends gathered around and sat with him in silence for seven days and seven nights to help him bear his misery. Men and women of the ancient world thrived and survived in communities, small towns, and cities, travelling with their tribes.

Abraham had a household of several hundred. When King Chedorlaomer and three other kings took Abraham’s nephew Lot captive, Abraham rallied the trained men of war who had been born in his household—318 men—to retrieve what had been stolen (Gen. 14).

Jesus surrounded himself with men, and when he sent them out, he sent them in pairs (Luke 10.1)—no loners. In Acts, when Antioch sent men on missionary journeys, they always sent at least two together (Paul with Barnabas, Paul with Silas), and at points we find Paul travelling with a larger retinue (Acts 20.4).

God has always spoken of his faithful ones as a covenant people. Yes, God saves individually, but individuals are never saved in isolation. God’s assembly supports, encourages, lifts up, heals, helps, prays for, teaches, admonishes, rebukes, forgives, loves—each other. Paul needed to be with the brethren whether he was in Ephesus, Philippi, or Corinth because they fed him just as he fed them. God’s mercy and comfort is not meant to be accepted from him and then kept for ourselves—God “comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God” (2 Cor. 1.4).

God designed us to be team players.

We live in an isolationist world. Ironically, we hold the illusion that we are super-connected and have hundreds of friends, yet how many real friends do we have? Do our online communities fulfill us the way God intended, the way he designed us? When we post our latest success on Faceplant or Instapotty and our digital network throws thumbs and hearts at us, is this healthy human interaction God’s way? A sizeable percentage of our eight billion brothers and sisters now seem to accept this online fiction as reality.

And they are so lonely.

Because it’s not real.

God created us to be together, to talk face-to-face, to literally be there for one another.

Anyone need some help with some chores around the house? Let me know